FFFF: Your First Black Girlfriend

by | February 14, 2014
filed under FFFF, Racism


Friday Feminist Funny Film logoNew York-based writer and comedian Akilah Hughes was inspired by challenges in her own interracial relationship to create this funny and pointed video about how to treat black women as human. Hughes told the Huffington Post:

I think Black women are exoticized in interracial relationships because the media only portrays Black women in a few ways, while other races tend to get more options. The media mold for a young Black woman is very limited–must be extremely aggressive, commandeering, unintelligent, etc.–while that has not been the case with the overwhelming majority of Black women I’ve met from all different backgrounds. Truthfully, I think more Black women would feel comfortable dating outside of their race if that wasn’t the case, because it’s one thing to have a TV show or movie that doesn’t know you see you in that negative light–it’s quite another to find out that your significant other does as well. When media starts to reflect the actual world we inhabit instead of aiming to create it, I’m sure there will be greater understanding in interracial relationships.

Transcript (after the jump):

Akilah: Hi! I’m your first black girlfriend! Yes, you can touch my hair. But your friends can’t, and your family can’t, so don’t ask.

Tell your family I exist. Look, this is non-negotiable. Do you want to date me or your mom? Me? Good! Then man up and tell her about us.

Your friends are going to ask you what it’s like to be with a black girl, and there are only two acceptable responses: 1) Make a really funny joke about eating fried chicken every night, or 2) Tell them to stop exoticizing your relationship because I’m just a human woman like any other human woman.

You can get fried chicken; I don’t care.

That is not what “ashy” means.

Stop staring at my satin cap, okay? I wear it because I don’t want my hair to go everywhere and look like a mess. I know you can’t recognize when my hair looks a mess but I don’t want side-eye from the black people on the train.

That’s  not what “nappy” means.

Look, I’d like to watch The Help or Django or 12 Years a Slave with you, but if you’re going to make sex weird because of it, I don’t want to, all right? I know you don’t think slavery was cool, but if you could just talk to your white friends about your guilt instead of making me feel it, that’d be fine.

You can never say the n-word. Not even if it has an “a” on the end of it. Nod so I know you understand because I’m not going to tell you again. Thank you.

You can tell me you like Scandal because of the ensemble cast but I know it’s because you have Olitz fantasies.

(in bed) You’re seriously going to ask me how it compares to a black guy’s right now? You’re serious? Like, you’re really doing this…

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