friends with benefits

Ding-Dong, Courtship is Dead, and I’m Just Fine with That

courtshipBy Alicia Costa This week the Internets has been abuzz over a piece run by The New York Times about the death of traditional courtship and a shift in our generation toward a “hook-up culture”. The culprit of this is our love for texting and avoidance of face-to-face interaction. The men are not taking us out for fancy dinners and the women are not impressed. Society in 20 years will be overrun with barren spinsters and lonely bachelors! So, I’d like to throw my hat in the ring as someone who is guilty of engaging in this “hook-up culture”. Why? I have a busy and full life. Maybe I’m a terrible woman but I find there is nothing wrong with “hanging out” instead of getting flowers and going out for dinner. I like texting and casual flings. So I’m contributing to the death of romance and I’m not sorry. I’ve been in one long-term relationship of 4.5 years. Shortly thereafter I had a disastrous attempt to turn a best friend into a relationship. By the end of this period of my life I was emotionally, mentally, and physically burnt out. Okay – I was a bit of a mess. I was chronically underemployed and both my ego and self-esteem had seen better days. I was mourning the loss of having two of my favourite men in my life and in no way had the desire or mental capacity to date. I spent a lot of time drinking and trying to get my career going. However, being a lady with certain needs I was eager to find something to sustain myself without all the emotional drain that comes with dating. So I found myself a gentleman for an ongoing casual arrangement. And it was awesome, lasted five years, and I have no regrets about it. As I’ve already outed myself as a contributor (and supporter) of the evil hookup culture I thought I’d share my tips and tricks on how to get your rocks off and not get tied down. Read more

Posted on by Alicia Costa in Feminism Leave a comment